Another Blessing Day

Another blessing day.

My mind wakes up ready to do something big. Productive. Meaningful. Something that matters beyond me. And yet, when I sit down with that energy, there is no idea that truly lights me up. Nothing I feel deeply passionate about. Just noise. Just pressure.

When that happens, I get stuck.

And when I get stuck, boredom creeps in. Then doubt. Then I stop.

I genuinely want to create something for the public — something that helps, connects, or heals. But the silence feels loud. No engagement. No comments. Not even one person reaching back. And that makes me question everything.

Is my content wrong?
Is my audience wrong?
Is my timing wrong?
Or is it simply… me?

So I stop. I rethink. I look for a new idea.

Days pass. Sometimes weeks. Sometimes a whole month.

Then, somehow, I come back again — carrying the same hope, the same uncertainty, the same questions.

I don’t have a mentor guiding me through this. I once thought I did. A really good mentor reached out to me in early December. For a moment, I felt seen. Encouraged. Like maybe I wasn’t walking this path alone.

And then… silence.

I don’t know if he gave up on me, or if life simply got in the way. He kind of disappeared from Instagram. Ghosted, unintentionally or not. But the impact stayed with me.

It made me think harder.

What’s wrong with me?
What am I missing?
How do others get attention so easily while I struggle just to be noticed?

Sometimes I wonder if this path — creating, sharing, building something from the heart — is even meant for me.

And yet… I know this doubt isn’t unique.

Every great person I admire must have stood here at some point. In this fog. In this quiet season where self-belief feels fragile and reassurance feels necessary. I see people doing similar things and making good money. I see others launch products and instantly receive attention and validation.

And I’m here — unsure where to go, unsure which path to focus on, unsure which voice inside me to trust.

The most frustrating part?

When I talk to others, they give me ideas. Good ideas. Logical ideas. But they don’t click. They don’t land in my body or heart. And so I circle back to my own thoughts again.

Round and round.

Thinking.
Doubting.
Planning.

But not acting.

This is my loop.

And maybe this is not a failure story — but a becoming one.

Maybe this season isn’t asking me to have all the answers.
Maybe it’s asking me to stay honest.
To stay soft.
To keep showing up — even without clarity.

For now, this is where I am.
A soft warrior, learning how to sit with uncertainty without abandoning myself.

And maybe… just maybe… that’s enough for today.